Bones: “The Cheat in the Retreat”


Grade: B

Airdate: 9/23/13

This week Bones almost out goofed itself. And this was also in an episode that had two Cam (Tamara Taylor) crying scenes and Sweets (John Francis Daley) deciding to take a leave of absence from the FBI. So, some of the goof almost seemed out-of-place, especially after such a heavy emotional episode last week. Don’t get me wrong I liked all of it, but it felt a little out-of-place sometimes.

The screamers started with telling me this was going to be a silly episode. Two animal control workers, who deserve a sitcom somewhere, find a bobcat eating a human arm. Cam and Arastoo (Pej Vadhat) make it clear that their relationship is still going strong because they are driving to the crime scene together. And I recently found out their ship name is Camastoo. That is awful.

Cam is complaining about her bills because it seems like someone has stolen her credit card. They are then pulled over and a cop arrested her for grand theft and credit fraud. Identity theft already had me thinking Palent and the cop never gave a reason for pulling over Arastoo, who was driving. Good job to all the writers and whoever come up with Palent’s character, I have never been so paranoid about a serial killer on this show.

The team does all their science and finds out the victim was a guy named Adam Pack that was killed on Indian land in Virginia, which turns out to be a couple’s retreat place. Booth (David Boreanaz) called in a favor and gets Cam out of jail, but all her credit is frozen and she doesn’t even have security clearance to get on the platform.

Bones (Emily Deschanel) and Angela (Michaela Conlin) are having to drink at Booth and Bones’ house pretty much just to tell us she is still mad at Booth. He comes home, she leaves. Booth then tells Bones that all of their suspects are still at the couple’s retreat so they should go undercover. Bones got just excited as I did about them being Buck and Wanda, but Booth decides they should be Tony and Roxy instead. Excellent way to mix it up, Bones. 

Booth and Bones get introduced to the rest of the couples, who are an older couple named the Schumachers and a gay couple. I would be slightly more excited about their inclusion, but I think that is Bones first gay character since season five. They then find out that the victim was their with his mistress, Kelly.

The back at the lab stuff, mostly focuses on Cam dealing with her pending criminal charges and stolen identity. Arastoo is being a good boyfriend and Angela and Hodgins (T.J. Thyne) are doing their best to help. Randomly in here is Sweets talking about wanting to quit and become a regular psychologist. Booth isn’t there, so he has these conversations with emotional guardian Angela. Though he helps with finding the killer, he still tells Booth he is taking some time off. Booth seems worried, but only voices that to Bones.

The killer come out of left field again this week and turned out to be the Schumachers. They are an adorable lovely couple — who get compared to Booth and Bones numerous times — that killed the victim because he took his mistress to a married couples retreat. They said marriage is special and should be valued. Aww, but they didn’t have a problem with the gay guys. OK Bones, maybe I can start forgiving you for using Angela’s sexuality as a few-episode arch back in season four.

Cam refused help for most of the episode, but at the end talked to Hodgin’s lawyer, accepted Angela’s computer-genius work and had a couples moment with Arastaoo at work. Like usual, the case mirrored Booth and Bones relationship because they turned out to be the closest couple at the retreat — save for the killers. If it wasn’t for the random killers, random Sweets’ self-doubt and high goof level I would have rated this episode higher. Oh, there was also a montage of people doing an obstacle course in one of those inflatable sumo wrestler suits and Bones did an Native American chant in a Jersey accent. Did I forget to mention that?


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