American Horror Story: “The Dead” (S3ep7)

Much like last week on American Horror Story: Coven, this week was mostly set up for the craziness that is going to led us into the end of the season. So, much like last season a lot of stuff happened very fast but it was all awesome and in some cases really unexpected. But, I will get to your complete 180 in personality later, Zoe.

We open in a tattoo shop with normal, frat guy Kyle (Evan Peters) swagging around to the music as all his frat brothers get tattoo. He says he isn’t going to get one because he wants to be a hero some day when he meets the mayor he doesn’t want a college mistake to be on his arm. One frat boy says that’s dumb and then makes a yo mamma joke.

1 kyle

Switch to FrankenKyle in the basement of the school and he keeps finding his frat brothers’ tattoos on him and cries. Zoe (Taissa Farmiga) then comes to kill him with Madison’s (Emma Roberts) tiny gun. She can’t do it, Kyle tries to do it himself but she stops him. He continues to cry.

Up to this point we know something is wrong with Kyle but not what. That is finally explained in a very well done voice over by Madison, who explains that when she was alive she would do anything to stop feeling. But, know she can’t feel anything and would do anything to be able to feel again. She is going around taking all the drugs, drinking all the booze and eating all the food in the house. But, luckily it doesn’t effect her and she is able to save Cordelia (Sarah Paulson) from tumbling down the stairs. When she does, Cordelia sees that Fiona (Jessica Lange) did kill her.

1 kyle

Fiona is still off about to have sexy times with the Axeman (Danny Houston). She notices that he was a dead body in his bathtub, but sleeps him anyway. When she is about to leave because it was just a one-night stand, the Axeman said he has been in love with her since she first come to the school. It was a rather creepy speech and luckily Fiona thought so too and told him to say the eff away from her. But, she does find him again at the end of the episode.

Back at the school, Zoe is trying to teach Kyle how to communicate. It isn’t going so well. Madison then walks in. She forgot who Kyle is and only seems interested once Zoe said they brought him back from the dead. Zoe leaves to go talk to Cordelia. Once she is gone, Madison asks Kyle what his death was like because there was nothing after hers but now everything just feels empty. They seems to have some sort of connection.


Cordelia is stumbling around her office slightly but sounds more commanding then pre-blindness Cordelia. She tells Zoe Fiona killed Madison and now they have to kill her. Zoe only gets freaked out when Cordelia tells her, it doesn’t matter if she is the supreme or not. If Fiona thinks she is she is in danger. Zoe heads back to Madison to tell her the kill-Fiona plan, but finds her banging Kyle. Evan Peters’ butt get a lot of screen time.

Queenie (Gabourey Sidibe) and LaLaurie (Kathy Bates) have a connected story line again. They both go to get a snack in the middle of the night, but Madison zombie-ate all the food. So, they go bond over a trip to Sonic together. Queenie says she doesn’t fit in with the rest of the coven and somehow “ended up in a fast food parking lot at 3 a.m. with an immortal racist.” LaLaurie says the coven will never accept her because she’s black. Sometimes this show makes Orange is the New Black seem not racist.

Queenie goes to talk to Marie (Angela Bassett). She doesn’t really say much and at one point defends the white witches and even LaLaurie. Marie said she just doesn’t know the real her yet. She sends her back telling her to ask LaLauire what she really did and if she wants to switch sides LaLaurie is the price. Marie also said that mixing Queenie’s witch powers with voodoo would make her more powerful than Fiona. Interesting.


Then out of now where, Zoe found Spadling’s (Denis O’Hare) severed, enchanted tongue and puts it back in his mouth. She asks if Fiona really killed Madison. Myrtle had made it so his tongue can’t lie and he says yes. Then Zoe just straight up stabs him. What? You were against killing him just last week, Zoe.

That did led to this next scene, so I should stop complaining. Zoe goes to take a shower to wash the blood off. Madison walks in on her and is like sorry I banged Kyle but that doesn’t mean you don’t have chance with him. She said Kyle was the only thing that made her feel alive and he is already dead so her killer vagina isn’t going to be a problem. Then their chemistry level shots through the roof as Madison takes her head and says “come here.” She leads her into the bedroom, where she sits next to a most-normal-looking-we-have-seen-him Kyle. They both extend their hands to Zoe and she takes both and walks toward the bed. We then see a towel drop to the ground. With everything they can show on this show, we don’t even get a glimpse of this implied threesome.


The episode ends with Queenie taking LaLaurie to “get her hair cut” at Marie’s. Marie comes out and locks her in a cage and has Queenie cut her so she can use her blood for some weird voodoo face paint. LaLaurie looks shocked that Quennie turned on her. But, she did tell her earlier that she once killed a slaves’ baby and used it blood as a face mask in front of its mother, so maybe there friendship wouldn’t have worked.

I have nothing but praise for this show, expect Zoe’s sometimes unexpected behavior. But, Misty and Myrtle are back when the show returns week so I’m not complaining.


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